I don’t care: A caregiver’s love

I don’t care.

The dishes. You have to watch her. She forgets to use soap. Or sometimes, she doesn’t rinse it off.

I don’t care.

Are you sure about that? She’ll probably pull up the flowers too.

I don’t care.

I’d be careful about that. What if she paints the wrong thing?

You know what? She did. And I.don’t.care.

She did it wrong. We looked up, and the floor and railing close to the column were yellow. She had painted beyond the column.

I don’t care.

I checked on her in the flower bed where she was busily pulling weeds, and sure enough, some flowers had come up with the weeds.

I don’t care.

And my dishes. So what!?

If I can create for her even the tiniest opening into a world of doing, contributing, helping, if going there brings her a moment of joy —a fraction of a moment!—, I don’t care if she can’t do the thing perfectly. I don’t care if she gets it all wrong.

The tiny inconveniences of re-rinsing dishes, rescuing flowers, removing errant paint? I don’t care. These are the biggest ways to love her now.

©Pennie Nichols. All Rights Reserved. 2021.

For more stories about mom’s journey with Alzheimer’s explore my website.

About Pennie Nichols

This little corner is dedicated to some of the things that interest me and to those of you who share those interests about relationships, travel, cooking, gardening, canning, jewelry, and writing. I’ll throw in some recipes and stories for your reading pleasure.

10 Replies to “I don’t care: A caregiver’s love”

  1. Judy Allen

    Beautiful, Pennie ! I wish I could have had a bit more patients with mother! I’ve asked God to forgive me and he has. I still think of it often.
    I so enjoy your stories and that Martha is blessed to have you and your love. This is not easy or quick. Mother always said, “Martha was one of the hardest working women she ever knew”!!
    Thank you Pennie for your life in words! Give John Edward my love❤️ Judy Pittman Allen

    Reply

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